The truth is, I have drafted two other blog posts before I even attempted the mandatory ‘introductory’ post because it is far easier to waffle about certain things than describe myself to strangers on the internet. Hi, by the way.
Truthfully, I don’t think I want to introduce myself; I want to write as anonymously as possible because I have very little faith in the success of this blog (and by success I mean having anyone but me reading it).
As a warning, however, this blog will have an emphasis on mental health and my attempts to understand my own and challenge my my plethora of inner contradictions.
I am prescribed antidepressants, yet I cannot refer to myself as depressed. Logically, I’m more than aware that diagnostically I tick a lot of boxes. Logically, I’ve seen an improvement in my mood and behaviors since being prescribed anti-depressants. I also study Psychology at university; I have an awareness of depression as an illness, something out of personal control and something NOT to be ashamed of. I have friends with mental health issues who I fully support, who I would hate to think of as ashamed about their mental health. I am not ashamed of my mental health. I am just not depressed.
What am I? I am a mess. I am abnormal. Now, logically, I do not believe ‘normal’ exists. I regard ‘normal’ as a subjective and abstract concept with variable definitions. I, however, am not normal.
Now it is widely said that the key to good writing is always leave them wanting more. This is not good writing, and I very much doubt anyone wants anymore of my ramble but irregardless- I won’t give away all of my inner contradictions just yet. I’ll leave you hanging.
On that note, have I finished my first blog post? I guess I have. I guess that’s an achievement. Hats off to me.